How to name and raise your children:
If your baby is a boy, name him Frak.
If your baby is a girl, name her Blossom.
Teach your child the difference between a flounder and a halibut.
Raise your child to believe that the voters might really be just that stupid and not to believe that Margaret Thatcher was once a world leader.
Share with your child the wisdom of Sarah Palin on health care:
"The America I know and love is not one in which my parents or my baby with Down Syndrome will have to stand in front of Obama's 'death panel' so his bureaucrats can decide, based on a subjective judgment of their 'level of productivity in society,' whether they are worthy of health care. Such a system is downright evil."
- Facebook posting about Obama's health care plan, Aug. 7, 2009.
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