How to name and raise your children:
If your baby is a boy, name him Wood.
If your baby is a girl, name her Twinkle.
Teach your child how and when to wink during debates.
Raise your child to believe that those caribou had it coming and not to believe anything said by scientists.
Share with your child the wisdom of Sarah Palin on on the agencies of the U.S. government:
"The fact is that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac have gotten too big and too expensive to the taxpayers."
- Speaking in Colorado Springs, Colorado, Sept. 13, 2008. The two companies are in fact private entities.
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